The Wedding

I am pleased to write that the out of state wedding that has consumed me was a smashing success. It was my first role as a maid of honor, MOH, as my bride coined it. I will miss referring to myself as "mo." I have to say it was a lot of work, and I wasn't even around for most of the planning. But, shortly after I arrived on Wednesday until the end of Saturday, I felt like I was earning my keep. I was not prepared for what exactly a full mass would encompass and was a little overwhelmed when the rest of the wedding party sat while myself and the best man stayed with the bride and groom on the stage. It gave "standing beside you at your wedding" some serious meaning. I was close to those vows. There was plenty of discomfort upon realizing I had no program and didn't know what I should be saying, responding or singing. I did a lot of smiling. There was one part where the bride and groom went to a side room to lay a bouquet on the alter of Mary. I was to follow behind them. I felt like a strange chaperon, like they shouldn't be alone until it was all "official." According to 2 of the groomsmen I made a priceless face as I turned back toward the crowd for some sort of direction as to how long we were to hang out in this room - the three of us scratching our heads, trying to figure out when to return. I also did the horribly non-catholic response when the best man blessed me with with a "peace be with you" I replied, "thanks." What a goon! We rode to the church and reception in a pimped out limo. I do love the limo - but always struggle to climb in and out without flashing everyone. I was also responsible for trailing behind the bride, carrying her train. It's a humbling experience... and I had to ignore the photos being taken which I'm sure are not the least bit flattering of me - it wasn't my day. I was nervous about my toast - but feel I did well, and strangely enough, had guests tell me it was one of the better MOH toasts they've heard. It must be the influence of my Toastmaster attending father and I'm sure the drink beforehand didn't hurt. There was a great dance hall and the groom had a big turnout of highschool friends - so the dance floor was packed. I even got to slow dance with the best man, who was gentleman enough to ask me. Totally weird to watch your junior highschool friend get married. You say things like, "when I get married, you're like totally going to be my maid of honor" when you're 12 - but when it's actually happening it's fairly surreal.
I did really well being very happy for them throughout the whole weekend. It wasn't until Sunday morning, while I waited 3 hours at the airport, emotionally and physically exhausted, that I began to feel sorry for myself, for being single, feeling overlooked and somewhat hopeless, and I silently balled as I watched planes land and take off. Very dramatic. No worries... a couple of naps and a layover later and I was mostly recovered. No one deserves love, it is a blessing. Should we all be lucky enough to find it.