Today I went to a fashion show.... don't be too impressed. It was a work fashion show. Some of my co-workers were invited to be a part of it. I thought it would be entertaining to watch them strut their stuff down the runway. They've been joking about it for weeks. One of the guys has a bet; he gets $5 for every hip thrust he accomplishes on the runway. It was a forum for the courthouse to show appropriate vs inappropriate work attire. I arrived to find a lighted walk way. An emcee rattled off the do's and dont's of the productions, but the sound quality was bad and I was left to wonder whether or not they were encouraging the mini-skirt and pink pumps or whether they were frowning upon the exposed bra straps and, in one case, a butt crack.
I suppose it was all in good fun - but it was the kind of work event that compares to a drunken Christmas party - except everyone was sober today. My judge - the judge that I stand before on a regular basis, nervous that he will find fault in me because of some unruly probationer, stripped down to a wife beater and Timberlands, complete with a large gold chained $ replica .
All of the attendees received raffle tickets. I took one and shoved it in my pocket. I don't win raffles. At the end of the show they explained that had gifts to the raffle card winners. I lean over to my friend, "I always hope they don't call my number - I'd rather not win, than have to go up there to collect a prize." "oh," she says, "that's a lucky number."
And so there I sat, through bouquets of flowers, jewelry, and a gift card to Wal-Mart...."please not me, please not me, please not me."
"And finally, a gift card to the dress barn!"
I lean over to my friend, "I've never been there, I have a problem with the name, makes it feel gross."
"the raffle ticket # is: 475125"
I look down at my ticket in unbelief... "please not me, please not me, oh shoot that's me!"
My friend leans over, "that's you."
I hopped up and did a fake - oh yeah-I won something-I'm so excited-the dress barn!-face and briskly walked down the very runway I snickered at. I felt my face get bright red.
I hate winning. Strange really - I feel the same way about calling a radio station for concert tickets and having to shout the call letters. I won Dave Matthews tickets once and they made me repeat my excited, "I can't believe I won - thank 99.9!" because the first couple of times weren't excited enough.
I also feel this way about fishing. The whole while secretly hoping I will never feel a tug on my line and have to deal with reeling it in and grabbing the fish and feeling bad about it being hooked despite what they say about no nerves and no pain.
I'd much rather wish I had won or caught a fish and leave the same way I came.
I don't know how much the gift card is for... maybe a free something-or-another will change my mind about the barn.
I suppose it was all in good fun - but it was the kind of work event that compares to a drunken Christmas party - except everyone was sober today. My judge - the judge that I stand before on a regular basis, nervous that he will find fault in me because of some unruly probationer, stripped down to a wife beater and Timberlands, complete with a large gold chained $ replica .
All of the attendees received raffle tickets. I took one and shoved it in my pocket. I don't win raffles. At the end of the show they explained that had gifts to the raffle card winners. I lean over to my friend, "I always hope they don't call my number - I'd rather not win, than have to go up there to collect a prize." "oh," she says, "that's a lucky number."
And so there I sat, through bouquets of flowers, jewelry, and a gift card to Wal-Mart...."please not me, please not me, please not me."
"And finally, a gift card to the dress barn!"
I lean over to my friend, "I've never been there, I have a problem with the name, makes it feel gross."
"the raffle ticket # is: 475125"
I look down at my ticket in unbelief... "please not me, please not me, oh shoot that's me!"
My friend leans over, "that's you."
I hopped up and did a fake - oh yeah-I won something-I'm so excited-the dress barn!-face and briskly walked down the very runway I snickered at. I felt my face get bright red.
I hate winning. Strange really - I feel the same way about calling a radio station for concert tickets and having to shout the call letters. I won Dave Matthews tickets once and they made me repeat my excited, "I can't believe I won - thank 99.9!" because the first couple of times weren't excited enough.
I also feel this way about fishing. The whole while secretly hoping I will never feel a tug on my line and have to deal with reeling it in and grabbing the fish and feeling bad about it being hooked despite what they say about no nerves and no pain.
I'd much rather wish I had won or caught a fish and leave the same way I came.
I don't know how much the gift card is for... maybe a free something-or-another will change my mind about the barn.
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