Top things that made trip to Seattle an adventure

1. Sleeping past 4:30 am alarm, only to awake in panic at 5:15 am, 2 short minutes before my ride arrived.
2. I saw the signs that clearly stated no liquids over 3 oz; I checked all my goods. Nothing over 2.5 oz. However, missed the part about them all needing to be in a zip lock bag. Security guard, to my embarrassment, took out my 6 lip glosses, 2 hand lotions and contacts and informed I could not proceed with my most favorite things. Am out of time, beg her for my contacts and ask her to toss the rest :( Spend the next 2 1/2 hours with dull, dry lips and hands.
3. Go out dancing and encounter: a young man from Tacoma who is wearing more eyeliner than I ever have or will ever wear, but he tells me I'm beautiful and the eyeliner seems a small barrier to love. Come to senses and kindly dismiss his interest.
Meet halitosis man who tells me he used to own the Satellite Hotel and the Roadway in AND that, with him, I will never have to work again... he owns 3 sailboats.
V meets a drug dealer. She shares her love for Jesus and gives him her phone number. No worries, she does not answer his call.
4. Use trip as opportunity to try the best coffee outside of Europe. Never have coffee at same place twice. Decide Ladro wins for best americano with caramel syrup...hands down! Starbucks, can we still be friends?
5. Enjoy Pikes Place Market and have secret crush on smelly fish mongrels.
6. Attempt to snowboard in the heaviest, wettest snow I have ever seen. Spend most of time on butt in wet snow. At end of adventure, stand around a bonfire...until the flame blows toward me and I hear my own eyelashes sizzle. Am horribly concerned I will spend the next couple of months with a brown pencil, avoiding rain and snow. Am relieved when I discover my eyebrows are in tact and eyelashes are only short and stumpy.
7. Enjoy a sweet treat at the Cheesecake Factory, where our waitress congratulates us on almost finishing our cheesecake, which feels like an insult wrapped in a chocolate bow. Leave feeling slightly ashamed.
8. Got a taste of the good life while house sitting in Bellevue. Waterfront house, flat screen tv, leather couch, 2 gas fireplaces and boat out back. However, no chocolate in the pantry.
9. Went to the impressive library downtown where an awkward salesman at the gift shop presented an eyeglass case as though it were a magic trick for approximately 5 minutes. Left without magic glasses holder.
10. Am scolded and admonished by a woman, "that is a rare bird. stop harassing it!" after my attempts to get a Blue Heron to move so I can see its wing span. Apparently, ca-ca-cawing and flapping my arms may endanger this rare specimen.
10. Ate sushi at restaurant with conveyor belt. Could pick and choose what I ate as I saw fit. Reminded me of the airport baggage claim, except with raw fish and wasabi.

Winter Retreat

Retreat? For whom?
I felt a little under the weather leading up to the trip and I thought surely God will heal me from any illness so I could fully minister to the needs of these teenagers... and again, I am reminded that my will is not God's. It was a long ride up to Winter Park - teens with lots of energy and excitement. I sat alone, one of the bennies of being an "adult." Upon arrival I discovered I would be responsible for 2 rooms of girls. Fortunately 1 of the rooms was full of compliant, rule-following pre-teens, still eager to please adults. I met the room of other girls to be greeted by a, "well, at least your cool." This was a flag if I've ever seen one. Why, yes, I'm way cool - but for you to find that an advantage to your intentions tells me we might have some problems. Sure enough, after our first leader's meeting 2 of my ladies were in the hallway with explanations as to why security had been around. These 2 were giggly, boycrazy and mirror hogs. The 2 other girls were quiet, timid and unsure of themselves.
I slept on a pull-out with each spring digging into me, kleenex readily available and 2 girls chatting. I have not played the role of adult-disciplinarian with any one but criminals. "Girls, it's late - you've got 2 minutes before lights out." "Please be quiet, everyone is trying to sleep." "Ladies, no more talking." In an attempt to get some buy in from their own interests I encouraged them to get their beauty rest. And then I heard the faint sound of cell phones - that's right. They pulled out their cell phones and began to text each other!
Mornings were difficult - the 2 at the mirror - putting on eyeshadows, glitter, lip gloss, etc. The other 2 too shy to ask to use the sink to brush their teeth and me with own high maintence needs for daily showers and a blowdryer.
In the morning I went snowboarding with a young guy who seems to be a bit of an outsider with his own peers. We did well together and he taught me some snowboarding skills. He had extreme patience with me and was eager to encourage me when I did well. However, his desire to get to the top of the mountain almost lead me astray. In the afternoon we were joined by my quiet 2 who had taken snowboarding lessons in the morning. One was eager to get on the slopes, and the other reminded me of myself as a junior higher - defeated, uncomfortable and embarassed. She opted out of continuing and I found I had difficulty finding the fine line between encouraging and doting. She was left to hang out at the lodge with one of the leaders. And then there were 3. We took a run down a green and worked on our "mad skills."
My evening consisted of crashing in my room during their worship service and hanging out with one of the other sickies who was waiting for her parents to pick her up because the stomach flu was proving to be a bit much for the weekend.
On the day of rest, I was forunate enough to do just that. I went to the mountain with the skiiers and hung out at the lodge. I was there in case someone wanted to quit or needed a break. I got some coffee, sat outside by an outdoor fire and read a free magazine - I am now knowledgeable on the latest happenings in the skiing/boarding world. I sat and watched from the lodge window as the ant-sized people came down the mountain - some flying, some falling. I tried to take notes for my next adventure and was bummed I wasn't well enough to be up there myself. After packing the bus and a group photo, we headed back down to the springs- surprisingly, the bus was as loud as the way up - kids still full of energy despite late nights, early mornings and exhausting activities.

The Blues

I called the local child abuse hotline today for some mandatory reporting...the woman who took my call put me on hold....the music playing? An instrumental composition of Elton John's "I guess that's why they call it the blues." Is it me or does that just seem wrong?

P.S.

I am currently experiencing Pretend Syndrome. Pretend Syndrome is when, in life, you realize that you have no idea what you are doing. You go through the motions, because it is expected of you...but there is a deep fear that someone is going to find you out. They're going to figure out that you have no idea what you are doing and expose you to everyone.
I feel like this frequently. Like today, speaking with a heroine addict. I do what I need to do, I ask the questions, I challenge the answers and I attempt to direct. But, when it comes down to it - I know very little about addictions and can't relate at all. I recognize my dependany on Starbucks coffee, other than that... I've got nothing. Can she tell that when she talks about shooting up I want to cry for her? Give her a hug?
I have volunteered to be a chaperone for the church junior high winter retreat this weekend. I thought it would give me an opportunity to get to know some of my girls better and they needed another female leader. The closer Friday gets, the more anxious I am. Does no one notice that I'm not a "leader?" That I really don't know what I am doing? I'm feelig the pressure that "cabin time" for 5 teens is my responsiblity. Not to mention my time on the mountain with the skiiers and snowboarders. I volunteered to hang out on the bunny slope and it is now sinking in that I'm not just taking care of #1.
I ran around tonight, trying to get winter gear - feeling too rebelious to fork out the dough for a helmet (which is mandatory for the students). I received a schedule for the weekend and realized that I am responsible to get kids here and there by now and then... I don't own a watch. I had to go out and buy a watch?!
P.S. Don't tell anyone...I will pretend my best and maybe no one the fear behind my eyes.

Quarterlife crisis

I worked as a teller at a bank when the quarter craze started. A new quarter every so often. Die hard collectors would come in to the bank expecting our small Colorado branch would have the latest on the day of release. I saw the collection books and was shocked that people would have so much patience to collect 50 quarters over the course of years. I had customers who would buy rolls of quarters, just to see if they could find the ones they didn't yet have.
Colorado? "Oh man! It doesn't get released until June 2006 - that's forever from now!" I would commiserate with some of the disappointed Colorado collectors. I remember thinking that life in 2006 would be completely different for me. Would I even care when the quarter came out? For all I knew, I would be raising children and keeping a husband happy - who has time to keep track of quarter releases.
Late last night I was scrounging quarters to do laundry. It was only because it was shiny and clearly brand new that it caught my eye. I pulled the quarter out of the pile. There it was, "Colorful Colorado." Shocking. It was a wrinkle in time moment - where with a quick look over my shoulder I can remember life back when 2006 would be ages away. And here it was. No child rearing. No happy husband. Using quarters the same way I have since 1998... for clean underwear and sheets.

Texas Friday

I was invited to join a couple friends on a trip up to Denver to check out a "Texas band." I love to discover sub-cultures. I had no idea that people followed Texas bands, I don't think I knew there were "Texas bands." I got a short lesson before the trip and now have a new understanding of a people who consistently follow emerging artists from Austin as they travel and perform across our great state. We arrived at the alley-type venue in Denver and paid our $8. The first band was interesting to watch, the lead singer a female with super short hair, tattooed arms and dressed in 50's area clothing down to the boxy heeled shoes. I have always said that I love live music and always have a good time at a concert. The start to this evening was no different. Okay, I wouldn't buy the cd, but there is something about watching performers get into their own music, the facial expressions, and my imagination of what life on the road looks like for them. A short break and a new band... This one started a little rough and by the third painful song with a singer who couldn't enunciate or carry a tune it was proving to be much too painful. They clearly had stepped out of the garage or their mother's basement years before they were primed. I was not enjoying this concert or this live music. We decided to bail - on our way out the door we found out it would've been another one and a half hours of garage band music before the headliners were up. Hardly worth the sacrifice and pain.
"Let's go to the Stampede for some dancing." Why not? Right. We arrive to find the place mostly empty, not the kind of place for 3 single ladies to hang out on a Friday night. After much deliberation, we decide we will not call it a loss of a night and travel over to the Grizzly Rose to attempt the same. Shortly after we arrive, we discover it is college night. Lots of underagers with black x's remind me of how old I am. We are eventually approached by 2 young guys who have been drinking. It isn't until one of them takes me out on the dance floor that I discover he can't country dance. For the length of the song, it is free lance dance time with a strange intoxicated boy. Nothing awkward about that. Nothing quite like being out on the wooden dance floor, spotlight on the dancers, live band on the stage and smiling like I'm having the time of my life with a guy who struggles with eye and hand coordination to turn me. He was upset when, at the end of the song, I excused myself from the dance floor.
I'm kind of thinking Texas might be a better place for Texas music and country dancing.