I have become a business woman. I own my own business. It is scary and hard and takes a lot of time and a lot of research but I have decided that it is worth it. I am CEO and operator of something. I hope that I can operate this business better than I opperate my life!
cmt
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Old School
So, it has been forever since I blogged my life occurances so we are going to have a few in row.
Recently I got onto myspace and did some playing around... My Space offers a plethora of opportunity to find new people and old friends (or foe) depending on your desire. So I have to admit, IT IS AN ADDICTION...looking up old friends and then looking at their friends and finding other friends. It is crazy. I have found too many of my friends have gotten married since I came up to Alaska. AND some have even had kids!!!
I am sure that some of the people could care less if I knew how they were doing or what they were up to but it is neat to get a glimpse into their life.
cmt
Recently I got onto myspace and did some playing around... My Space offers a plethora of opportunity to find new people and old friends (or foe) depending on your desire. So I have to admit, IT IS AN ADDICTION...looking up old friends and then looking at their friends and finding other friends. It is crazy. I have found too many of my friends have gotten married since I came up to Alaska. AND some have even had kids!!!
I am sure that some of the people could care less if I knew how they were doing or what they were up to but it is neat to get a glimpse into their life.
cmt
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Peace that passes understanding
On Thursday, God was gracious and revealed to me why He has not blessed my job search and why I am still here. It's amazing how easily I forget He knows/establishes the bigger plan. I've been looking at my little scenario from my perspective - what I want to do, what I don't want to do, where I want to go, where I don't want to stay. There is so much more to why I am here than what I see - go figure. I am establishing a friendship with a non-believer who has reached rock-bottom and has made me aware of my impact on their life. Suddenly, work doesn't seem so bad and this town doesn't seem so small. I will stay as long as God wants me here. It's a shame I couldn't trust God in blind faith, but I am thankful that he has enlightened me.
-jlt
-jlt
Creepy -Creeperton
A good portion of my job is talking to various providers in the Springs. We contact each other to discuss client enrollment, compliance, and treatment. We build professional relationships, seldom meeting. Just recently Sheila said to me, "I hear all kinds of things about you. We should meet sometime over lunch. I'd love to put a face to the name." Nothing has come of that - but it is a common occurrence. Every now and then, one will show up at the office and introduce themselves. I find it a fascinating game - sometimes people look exactly like you would imagine them, and others are completely different. Dan and I had a conversation last week about being downtown and it being a good place to grab a bite to eat. "Well, I've never met you. It's been a while since I've been down to the office. You going to be there next Friday? Maybe I'll stop by and say 'hello.'"
So, on Friday I'm walking out of the community restroom, back to my office when I hear a, "Jana? Hey,how are you?"
"oh...it's Friday!" I shook his hand with my wet one. I had completely forgotten about it and half expected to be out of the office at lunch. But, no, here it was and here he was. Pretty close to what I imagined. An older (50s) man, hispanic. Okay, so we've seen each other...what now? I walk into my office, he follows and takes a seat. He's doing the creepy, once-over thing with his eyes. It dawns on me that this isn't just a put the name with the face game... I think Dan was expecting more. I'm uncomfortable and suggest he meet the new employees in the office and I drag my 2 female co-workers into my office to meet him. They don't stay long and both smile at me on their way out. I was praying it wouldn't get anymore awkward. Maybe this isn't that weird - maybe I'm just being overly sensitive. After small talk, he finally gets up to leave. I thank him for coming by and throw in the cliche face and name line. He leaves.... and then all of my co-workers crowd around and discuss the entire incident. I gather I wasn't being overly sensitive because they all found it extremely funny and wanted to know when Dan and I would be seeing each other again. Eeeagah!
-jlt
So, on Friday I'm walking out of the community restroom, back to my office when I hear a, "Jana? Hey,how are you?"
"oh...it's Friday!" I shook his hand with my wet one. I had completely forgotten about it and half expected to be out of the office at lunch. But, no, here it was and here he was. Pretty close to what I imagined. An older (50s) man, hispanic. Okay, so we've seen each other...what now? I walk into my office, he follows and takes a seat. He's doing the creepy, once-over thing with his eyes. It dawns on me that this isn't just a put the name with the face game... I think Dan was expecting more. I'm uncomfortable and suggest he meet the new employees in the office and I drag my 2 female co-workers into my office to meet him. They don't stay long and both smile at me on their way out. I was praying it wouldn't get anymore awkward. Maybe this isn't that weird - maybe I'm just being overly sensitive. After small talk, he finally gets up to leave. I thank him for coming by and throw in the cliche face and name line. He leaves.... and then all of my co-workers crowd around and discuss the entire incident. I gather I wasn't being overly sensitive because they all found it extremely funny and wanted to know when Dan and I would be seeing each other again. Eeeagah!
-jlt
Monday, February 20, 2006
President's Day
I get so excited for days off! Especially when they aren't days off for everyone. I was going to get up early and make the most of this President's day. The morning started an hour after it was supposed to - just couldn't get out of bed. I went to the gym and saw the most appalling sight. A man in the shortest shorts I have ever seen. He wasn't German or old...which are scenarios where I expect to see shockingly small shorts - he was a mostly good-looking, buff fellow. I was so scared he might sit down and expose himself.
I had grand plans to be diligent and look for jobs today - my goal was to complete 2 applications before I could do anything fun. I hate looking for jobs - I want to leave my current situation so badly, but find my job search has really been unsuccessful. No significant leads, no interviews, no new job. I sat down today to begin an on-line app for a job overseas - dreaming big, right? I worked for a couple hours to get to the appropriate site to fill out their resume (why can't i just give you the one I've already worked on, again?) and finally when I got to the end I had to enter my eligibility status, my what? When all was said and done - I had filled out the wrong resume and the archaic website had no "back" option. In the process of determining how to transfer or save my info - the window I had worked so hard on, was replaced by a brand new empty resume form. I completely fell apart... sobbed like a baby. I am so ready to move on to something different. A new city, new people, new environment, new employer and it feels like everything is working against me. I used to blame myself for being too lazy, not putting enough effort into it. But, geesh - here it is... the free day - sales, nice weather, and I'm hunched over the computer...I'm really trying. Just don't feel like God is opening the window.
I did get to spend some time with a good friend - laughter really is good for the soul, and I just finished my taxes. Uncle Sam owes me a nice chunk this year. Now if I could just get back on the horse and fight the beast that is the job search.
-jlt
I had grand plans to be diligent and look for jobs today - my goal was to complete 2 applications before I could do anything fun. I hate looking for jobs - I want to leave my current situation so badly, but find my job search has really been unsuccessful. No significant leads, no interviews, no new job. I sat down today to begin an on-line app for a job overseas - dreaming big, right? I worked for a couple hours to get to the appropriate site to fill out their resume (why can't i just give you the one I've already worked on, again?) and finally when I got to the end I had to enter my eligibility status, my what? When all was said and done - I had filled out the wrong resume and the archaic website had no "back" option. In the process of determining how to transfer or save my info - the window I had worked so hard on, was replaced by a brand new empty resume form. I completely fell apart... sobbed like a baby. I am so ready to move on to something different. A new city, new people, new environment, new employer and it feels like everything is working against me. I used to blame myself for being too lazy, not putting enough effort into it. But, geesh - here it is... the free day - sales, nice weather, and I'm hunched over the computer...I'm really trying. Just don't feel like God is opening the window.
I did get to spend some time with a good friend - laughter really is good for the soul, and I just finished my taxes. Uncle Sam owes me a nice chunk this year. Now if I could just get back on the horse and fight the beast that is the job search.
-jlt
Monday, February 13, 2006
Competition
I was invited to join a friend for a lacrosse game in Denver.
What began as an innocent invite became a blind date. Her boyfriend was, "going to bring one of his friends." I might add I had great apprehension for the evening. My friend invited me to spend the night or "crash" at her boyfriend's place in Denver instead of making the trek back to the Springs. She also added I should bring my bathing suit because her boyfriend's apt complex has a hot tub. Who does that? Who gets into their skivies with strangers? Much less a hot tub?
We arrive at the game - and let me say - lacrosse is a super fun sport to watch. The crowds were intense, the game is fun, plenty to be entertained by...except the discomfort of realizing the entertainment/sport industry caters to the fellas. During breaks, dancers would come out onto the floor, scantly dressed, swinging their hair around, with suggestive moves. Eeeks! What do you do? I contemplated most of the day what I would wear to this event, tried to go for an attractive casual look, and here I am sitting next to a guy I just met and watching dancers. Do you look at him? Do you avoid watching the dancers? Do you attempt to talk about the weather or that last crazy play while the chicks are shaking their...things.
At the next break a tall blonde in tight jeans and tall boots came out and announced a crowd participation game, at which time my new friend said, "wow, there are blonde bimbos at every break." He then pointed out the hot tub across the way with 4 bikini wearing ladies. Nice. Awkward. His consolation was that maybe at halftime they would have chip-n-dale dancers. I appreciated his addressing the topic, better than the naked elephants in the room thing. Alas, no male dancers, no guys in the hot tub (don't confuse that for disappointment - just a recognition of lack of equality... or something). You try hard to be attractive, to dress well, to be friendly, to engage and then you have to compeat with that, er them. Did I metion the old man behind me was shouting, hooting and hollering during the show? But not a peep during the game.
-jlt
What began as an innocent invite became a blind date. Her boyfriend was, "going to bring one of his friends." I might add I had great apprehension for the evening. My friend invited me to spend the night or "crash" at her boyfriend's place in Denver instead of making the trek back to the Springs. She also added I should bring my bathing suit because her boyfriend's apt complex has a hot tub. Who does that? Who gets into their skivies with strangers? Much less a hot tub?
We arrive at the game - and let me say - lacrosse is a super fun sport to watch. The crowds were intense, the game is fun, plenty to be entertained by...except the discomfort of realizing the entertainment/sport industry caters to the fellas. During breaks, dancers would come out onto the floor, scantly dressed, swinging their hair around, with suggestive moves. Eeeks! What do you do? I contemplated most of the day what I would wear to this event, tried to go for an attractive casual look, and here I am sitting next to a guy I just met and watching dancers. Do you look at him? Do you avoid watching the dancers? Do you attempt to talk about the weather or that last crazy play while the chicks are shaking their...things.
At the next break a tall blonde in tight jeans and tall boots came out and announced a crowd participation game, at which time my new friend said, "wow, there are blonde bimbos at every break." He then pointed out the hot tub across the way with 4 bikini wearing ladies. Nice. Awkward. His consolation was that maybe at halftime they would have chip-n-dale dancers. I appreciated his addressing the topic, better than the naked elephants in the room thing. Alas, no male dancers, no guys in the hot tub (don't confuse that for disappointment - just a recognition of lack of equality... or something). You try hard to be attractive, to dress well, to be friendly, to engage and then you have to compeat with that, er them. Did I metion the old man behind me was shouting, hooting and hollering during the show? But not a peep during the game.
-jlt
Friday, February 10, 2006
Very Pretty Song Lyrics
There is something about this song that is so beautiful. When I heard on 89.7, I thought of a lullaby but after reading the lyrics, it more of a love letter. Perfect for Valentine's Day. -CAT
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
The Incredible Shrinking Woman
I went to the Dr. yesterday and found out that I was not the 5'4" that I have, for the past decade and a half, reluctantly resigned myself to accept....
I am officially 5'3" and 1/4th of an inch.
I am not even the average height of a woman.
I feel like I should at least be 5'8" but maybe that's my ego speaking on my behalf.
Right now, I am ok with turning 30 in June but give it four more months and get back to me about it. If I am over-reacting about the loss of 3/4ths of an inch wait until the idea of another decade lost sinks in. However, now that I am shorter, it's got to sink a little lower. =-(
I am officially 5'3" and 1/4th of an inch.
I am not even the average height of a woman.
I feel like I should at least be 5'8" but maybe that's my ego speaking on my behalf.
Right now, I am ok with turning 30 in June but give it four more months and get back to me about it. If I am over-reacting about the loss of 3/4ths of an inch wait until the idea of another decade lost sinks in. However, now that I am shorter, it's got to sink a little lower. =-(
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